Solving the World’s Problems

Here’s something from an email chain I typed up today… I was asked if we had solved the world’s problems… Here’s my response.

And yes we solved the world’s problems… the Mad-City Ski will be introducing a new car that runs off the energy generated by big bright show skier smiles. Just keep a shit eating grin on your face and it’ll cruise down the highway. Revert to a normal smile and it’ll stop damn near immediately. Still working on a way to power boats with this power, but they have a tough time maintaining their smiles as they pull people of the dock (some are concentrating just too hard to smile). Besides solving the world’s energy crisis and the issue of road rage (it’s just too hard to yell mean things while maintaining this smile), the ski team will make enough money to buy up Monona Bay and all the surrounding land and convert it into the world’s best show ski site and ski school. And we also plan to move MG&E’s hot water outputs into the bay to keep it heated year round for skiing.

I was then questioned on pissing off the property owners and fisherman, to which I replied…

In my plan, the property owners would be very well off. The team purchases all the land around the bay to plant more trees (wind blocks) and create a huge park/ski site along the south shore of the bay (that is the best shore in the summer with Madison predominate south winds.) Basically, it would be a park all around the bay with the exception of the side with the train tracks on the shore.

Fisherman would be happy too… based on the need to be able to run U shaped patterns, some new breakwaters would be installed in the southwest and southeast corners out in the bay to prevent waves from the U-shaped patterns from interfering with the calm water in the center of the show course. These breakwaters would be planted with trees to both provide additional windblocks and “hide” things that are out of the show course. The side of the breakwaters opposite the main show course would become prime fishing areas based on the new shoreline for small fish to hide which attract larger fish which the fishermen want. Due to the nature of the boat patterns, they’d be able to fish in these locations anytime, including during shows practices.

I can’t think of a way to help the ice fishermen though… they’d just be out of luck.

And in case you didn’t realize this by now… this is completely fictional and tongue-in-cheek. Not real. Don’t be offended or pissed off.

Visit… More pictures, more videos, more water skiing stuff.

A Nationals Review Teaser… EOD2.5

Yes, Mad-City is a ski team, but our highest scoring act wasn’t a skiing act… technically… it was our continuous comedy… all the little things that go between the water skiing acts. Here is undoubtedly the highlight of our comedy.

The Evolution of Dance 2.5.

You might want to hit the rest room first, some people have had a hard time controlling their bladder while watching this.

The Evolution of Dance 2.5Mad-City Ski Team – 2008 National Show Ski Tournament
Visit… More pictures, more videos, more water skiing stuff.

Ice Mite Fight

I grew up playing hockey, so it holds a special place in my heart. The NHL playoffs are fun to watch, and so is college hockey (I follow the Badgers). Olympic hockey is also a lot of fun to watch.

One thing I’ve never been a fan of is fights in hockey. I just never really saw the point. Once you’re old enough to check, there are so many legal ways to hit someone really hard, why throw your fist into somebody’s helmet. It just doesn’t make sense. So the frequent fights in the normal NHL games are pretty much a turn off for me.

Last time I went to a Badger hockey game, they had some Ice Mites playing hockey between periods. One kid tripped another and I stood up and started heckling the “refs” about missing the call. Another guy stood up and starting yelling it was clean. It became quite the funny scene and then pretty much the whole section started laughing. See Ice Mites are about 5, 6 or 7 years old and most can just kinda ice skate. They don’t know all the intricacies about playing position yet, they just kinda follow the puck. Lots of fun to watch… at least for a few minutes.

This video came to my attention from one of the many sports blogs out there. It shows, what looks like Ice Mites, getting into a fight. Unlike most fights, this one is hilarious. It almost looks like they are on the same team and someone from the other team comes to break up the fight. I had to keep myself from laughing out loud at work when I saw this. Enjoy…

Visit… More pictures, more videos, more water skiing stuff.

Inappropriate or Hilarious?

Or both? You decide…

Personally, I think both. I can’t help but laugh at this image, the winner of the latest Woot contest, but also feel bad that I think it’s funny. The image in question is from Woot user toby8195. Prepare to feel bad that you’re laughing so hard…

Visit… More pictures, more videos, more water skiing stuff.

Carl on the Giants and Packers

Carl is not as pissed as usual, although he is still a little grumpy. He doesn’t like that he has to wear his Jessica Simpson wig for 3 more weeks. Hopefully he’ll be able to take it off after next Sunday. Anyways, enjoy his commentary on the Giants, Cowboys and Packers.

Visit… More pictures, more videos, more water skiing stuff.